NOT OUR DAY JOB

It's no secret to anyone who knows me that I like to speak with my money, and as such, Gamestop gets the icey cold shoulder from me. I haven't purchased anything from there in a long long while. I'm not some elitist who prefers to buy from mom and pop stores, nor am I just too lazy to make the trip across town to the local Gamestop. No, my resolve was made after a series of frustrating and completely avoidable slights to my personage at the hands of Gamestop. Let's break it down.

I USED to buy games at Gamestop. It was convenient, and they usually had what I was looking for, when I was looking for it. I would walk in, get the game I wanted, pay the clerk, and walk out. Successful business transaction at its most basic. However, around mid PS2 life cycle I started noticing things I didn't like...

Used games sold as "New".
If I was to walk into Gamestop with a copy of MGS4 without the plastic wrap still on it, they would offer me a used game price. Fair enough. Now when I wanted to buy Abortion Fist a copy of the PS2 Contra game, the Gamestop said they had a new copy. So I went to get it, but it was just an empty opened case with an ugly ass sticker on it. "What is this?" I asked perplexed. "I thought you had this new?"
Apparently people had been stealing the games, so Gamestop decided they would open every new game, put the disk behind the desk, and put it back in the box when you bought it... Assholes, when I buy something for NEW price, it should be NEW by your own fucking definitions. Since opened is USED, you are selling me a USED fucking game for new price?!? Not only that, but now I look like an scumbag who just gets someone a gift that is totally open! "Hey man happy birthday, here's a game I bought you new, or just an old game I don't want anymore, you'll never know." Fuck you, Gamestop.

Some of these are new, some used...Happy Birthday!

Why did I pre-order?
I was stoked for Doom 3 ( I know I was young and dumb, and to be fair, it was a mistake many made). So I went into my local Gamestop and asked about it. Of course I could pre-order and pick it up the day of release, I was told. Fantastic I said. I paid the FULL AMOUNT for the game right there. $50 on faith. So the day Doom comes out I finish my shift at work like a madman and race to the Gamestop only to hear, "Oh yeah man, we didn't get that many so you're too far down on the list to get one today." What!?! I fucking pre-ordered, that is GS's holy grail of guaranteed sales, and yet here they are fucking it up completely! The store was about 30 minutes from closing and I was quite irate. What's worst is that they HAD copies of DOOM 3 on hand, but apparently since I was lower on the list, I could not have those copies, even though those copies only had $5 deposits, and I had already outright bought the game. I told the employee that unless the person came to pick that copy up I was taking it when the store closed. Luck would have it that the kid never showed, so I took the copy of the game home that night. Which brings up another shitty point. Me and whoever didn't show had both pre-ordered, and now his pre-ordered game was being taken by me even though he got his order in first. Basically Gamestop was gonna fuck someone over that night, I just wasn't letting it be me. Sorry mystery kid, Fuck you Gamestop.

It's not that hard honestly.

NO I DON'T WANT TO PRE-ORDER ANYTHING!!!
I'm not sure exactly when it started but at some point in time the Gamestop employees just went INSANE with the pre-order pushing. I had already decided never to pre-order from them again since they couldn't keep their word anyways. If I did buy there, it was a solely "get in, is the game wrapped in a box new? Ok. Buy it and I'm out" setup. But alas Gamestop felt that even this amount of business from me was too much. Any time I would go in they would ask if I wanted to pre-order some game if I purchased anything. Worst, they couldn't even use fucking context clues.
"Here, I'd like to buy MGS3"
"Would you like to pre-order a DS"
"No"
"Would you like to pre-order Pokemon Diamond?"
"I don't know what that is."
"It's a DS game."
"I don't have a DS."
"Would you like to pre-order a DS."
"Urge to kill rising RISING..."
The only question Gamestop employees need to be asking customers at checkout is "Why are you still shopping here?" Fuck you Gamestop.

A human being can only take being asked if he wants to reserve "GTA III San Andreas" so many times.

No I didn't pre-order it.
The final straw was an aggressive asshole tactic that was pulled on me about 3 times in 3 separate Gamestop stores. I would go in looking for a game.
"Hey you have Okami?"
One of the goons working would say "did you pre-order?"
"No I didn't"
Then the act would begin. The guys behind the counter would look at each other and say "oooooh he didn't pre-order... Uh I dunno man we probably are out, you should pre-order if you want to get these games..." The second guy would go into an amazing act of looking at clipboards and checking the computer to see if they could scrounge any copies, even though they were sure there were none left. Then finally the stars would align and "Ok you're in luck THIS TIME. We got ONE COPY LEFT, next time pre-order to be safe..." Then they would open the cabinet behind them where 12 copies of Okami are sitting and hand me one. The first time it happened I was too stunned to engage in a fist fight. By the third time, I decided to never shop there again. Fuck you Gamestop.

Memes are usually A-Fist's thing, but what the hell.

Well look at me, I've gone on a rant about why I hate Gamestop. But the bigger question here is why does ANYONE shop at Gamestop? Lets count any conceivable reasons:

Lower Prices: Nope. Gamestop sells at the full amount for a new game, while Amazon, Best Buy, Costco and other stores sell anywhere from 5-10$ cheaper.

Launch Day Guarantee: These days EVERYONE offers pre-orders, same day delivery, and sometimes will even sell before a release date. In fact you don't even have to leave the house to get a game on day 1.

A Robust Customer Loyalty Program: NOPE, wait....yes actually. I didn't think they did but Gamestop is stepping their game up to reward..WAIT...It costs $15 bucks?! Like everything else I bet it's a heaping pile of shit and lies.

Exclusive Content: Again everyone offers their own brand of this, and even limited editions can be found other places.

Knowledgeable Employees: All I need is for someone to open the games case and hand me the game I'm pointing at. What I DON'T NEED is for them to then try and sell me on pre-ordering Skylanders.

High Chance of Being Robbed/Shot: Well here is where Gamestop really does shine. Not for nothing it seems that the one type of person who Gamestop really attracts is the violent murdering type!

Used Games: If THIS is the reason you shop at Gamestop, take that $5 you saved and KILL YOURSELF.