NOT OUR DAY JOB

Now this apathy does NOT stem from me taking an elitist "been there done that." or "another modern FPS" type stance. Far from it. BF3 HAS been the second coming, and Metal Gear HD collection has me wanting to erect a pillow fort in my living room and replay every game in the series in chronological order. The apathy is not even a conscious thing. It's not wanted, and not welcome, but is sneaking in with a 6 pack of Smirnoff Ice and a box of condoms against my wishes. The problem is twofold really, and one element is out of my control, with the other one being my personal gaming "ninja way".

We've said it a lot here at NODJ: pacing is paramount. If you're constantly cranked to 11, you're never at 11. It's why a Michael Bay movie can put me to sleep (and I never sleep), or how Modern Warfare 3 feels like a constant hum instead of a potent slap to the face followed by an awkward pause. Pacing is key to create a sustainable level of interest. Think roller coasters, the stock market, shark week. Herein lies problem number one for me. It has been almost 3 straight months of incredible games. I simply don't have the constitution to maintain fever pitch levels of excitement for that long. Don't get me wrong. I can get hype just as good as the next blogger, and I can even sustain the hype until I'm done playing the game. But trying to sustain hype for a new game every week, for over a quarter of a year, is like trying to stay sexually supercharged after systematically intercoarsing the entire student body of the University of Florida. You sort of get to a point where you're just going through the motions. Am I right, Tebow? Sorry. I don't even know what that means.

After laboring for hours and digging into my entire knowledge of football, this was the best I could do.

Part two of my recent apathy problem stems from my approach toward games. I love games. Not the way I love Knock-Out highlight reels, or the way I love CG dinosaurs. No, my relationship with games is more like the love that brings you to the alter, remains faithful over a lifetime, and dies together with you in your sleep. I have this strange sense of commitment when I like a game (sometimes even when I don't like a game). When I say I'm going to play Uncharted 3, I don't mean I'm gonna toss it in and see a few cut scenes, and stumble through single player casually when I get the free time. No. What I mean is I'm going to get Uncharted, go home, take care of my adult responsibilities, and assign 3-5 hours a night of personal time where I play through the game start to finish. Replay the game on a harder difficulty. Set up a night to play online with friends. Get a Platinum trophy. Then, after all that, I will consider my relationship with Uncharted over, and we will part knowing that we lived a rich and full life together. I will then be fully able to re-accept a new game into my life, and the process continues.

Unfortunately with the current game pacing, having to then start up a similar relationship with another game a mere 7 days later proves very challenging. I'm looking for a relationship, not speed dating. Here is the source of my fatigue. I realize my own overbearing nature definitely plays a part in my increasing unwillingness to start into something new, but at the same time, I don't want to shortchange these great games. Release date is mostly not a developers fault (well except you Gears of War 3), and for me to just skip out the tons of extra content in say Batman: AC, simply because I have to keep up with the newer releases leaves me feeling guilty and full of self-imposed, feudal Japan levels of shame.

"You may install the bride."

So what's the solution? I guess slow down. Take it easy. Leave the game sealed in its store bought plastic wrap. Pick a game and enjoy it, cherish our time together, and then, when I'm good and ready, move on. In theory it's so perfectly simple. But for a guy who feels like he is cheating on Team Fortress 2 by only playing it 2 hours a week, the future is looking adulterous at best.